Hold that door please!

I just had to share this perfect moment that I experienced the other day. I was walking into the barbecue place, because I was in need of a little brisket.

As I walked up to the door of the restaurant, I spotted a young man with long shorts and a T-shirt also gunning for the entrance.

I thought to myself, 'We are going to get to the door at the same time. Is this going to be another door in the face as he walks through?'

I had gotten used to young men no longer holding the doors open for women. I had been raised to understand that it is a sign of respect to hold the door for someone, anyone, whether male or female, old or young.

It still always shocks and dismays me when someone walks through and then lets it slam into the person behind.

Well this time, I misjudged this young man. Not only did he hold the door open, but he then told me to go through first, and said 'Hi' for good measure. I was so thrilled!

I know, I know, I sound like my mom or something, but dad blasted, a little courtesy goes a long way. In the picture, above, my gentleman is the young man sitting at the table on the right. I don't know his name, but hopefully the little guy next to him will learn to be just as polite a young man when he grows up.

Sue, Tempe

Just say, No, not now, maybe later. Thanks.

I had a pleasant interaction with my friend Dannie Moriarty this week. And it kind of made me sad that the fact that it was pleasant was unusual.

I am involved in a lot of group activity. Not sure how it got this way, because I used to be a proud non-joiner. But there we are. I not only join, but lately I lead and I create. I get involved.

Anyway, all that means is that I am pushed for time. And this week, I pushed back just a little.

I have volunteered at the last three IgnitePhoenix events. It helped keep costs down and I got to see the show and hang out for the evening with a bunch of smart, funny people.

Dannie sent out a note this week asking again for volunteers. I'm feeling a little swamped and told her so. I told her thanks for asking, but I'm going to sit this one out. And I asked her to keep me on the list for future events.

She replied in an e-mail:

I will absolutely keep you on my list. I hope it is a lot of GOOD going on at work.

Thanks for letting me know!
Dannie.

Thanks for letting me know.

I won't go into details, but this simple, polite exchange felt a little unusual and I've been wondering why.

Rather than say, 'No, thanks,' or 'Not now, thanks,' or 'I am no longer interested in being involved,' some people just neglect to have the conversation.

Why? Is it that people who never hear 'No' don't know how to say 'No?' Why don't people feel comfortable engaging? There's a little too much avoidance.

Not quite sure why it is, but thanks, Dannie, for having an honest, simple, polite exchange this week.

Robin, Tempe

P.S. As I reread this post, trying to decide whether it is too negative for a Perfect Moment (decided no, Dannie's exchange was perfect), I realize that I've been keeping one friend hanging myself.

Judy: Yeah, still wanna do it. I'll call you.